When you think about it, working in an office is a strange concept. For forty hours a week, a multitude of staff share the same air space with near strangers – eating, drinking, typing and occasionally sleeping as one collaborative and well-oiled unit. Naturally, club this many people together in a single space, and bugbears, bothers and general nuisances will soon begin to surface. From nose-pickers and know-it-alls to those who outright refuse to wash the pots, offices across the land are chock-a-block with annoying people hell-bent on annoying others. If you’re inclined to aggravate, madden and generally wind up your co-workers, here are 8 guaranteed ways to annoy every person in your office (Disclaimer: Toner Giant cannot be held responsible for any impending backlash).
1. Chew Gum, Deafeningly
Like Alex Ferguson on the brink of claiming the Champions League title, chewing gum at the top of your lungs is a sure-fire way to pile on the infuriation. For maximum audibility, opt for Orbit.
2. Violate the Hot Drink Policy
The unspoken rule regarding the production of workplace teas and coffees is as set in stone as getting a pint in down the pub – everyone shares the load. To put the cat among the pigeons in your office, make your own coffee and feel the bitchy side eye rain forth.
3. Cook Something Offensive
Nothing gets backs up like an offensive odour permeating the workplace, and lunchtime is the perfect opportunity to unleash the stink. To get noses really turning up, microwave some tuna or other odorous catch.
4. Then, Forget to Wash up
Nothing says, “I’m annoying, aren’t I?” like food encrusted crockery left to wilt in the bottom of the sink. The Good Samaritan of the office will likely clean up after you – but they’ll hate you for it. Result.
5. Type Loudly
Everyone knows there’s no need to type loudly, yet some office workers still achieve a noise akin to a Gatling gun as they plough through the day’s admin. If you’re looking to rile nearby colleagues, pound those keys until your pinkies ache.
6. Spread Diseases
Cough, snot, sneeze: three symptoms, three crimes and three ways to be ousted from your workplace peer group. Those who arrive at work with a cold are often treated with leper-like derision; points are awarded for every illness you instigate.
Awkward encounters are a bugbear most office workers encounter on a daily basis – either in the lift, by the cooler or in the kitchen. Faced with an unfamiliar countenance, the unacquainted tend to crumble under the pressure. Remain silent, and wallow in the awkwardness.
8. Print Stuff, Forget to Pick It Up
Pick a business, any business. We’ll bet that their printer out-tray will be sky-high with documents long forgotten. If you want to score bonus points annoying both your boss and your teammates, print a wad of documents and play dumb when they ask: “Are these yours?”
Whilst we can’t make you or your colleague a better person, we can help you save money on your printing costs. How? With a complete range of ink and toner cartridges for a multitude of printer models, you can enjoy affordable, cost-effective printing at the touch of a button with Toner Giant.
To find out more, visit our homepage or call our friendly, helpful and entirely non-annoying team on 0845 365 3605.